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Not much to say, Jaylee`s Birthday coming up. She`ll be 3! I wonder why she came so late in my life....I wonder if I can keep up and live long enough to see her strong and happy in her life. I suppose that I was ready to give up and sit with this disease but Jaylee came and Hospitals and Dr`s and diapers had to be taken care of. Just thinking about it tires me. I don`t know how I accomplished what I did. I didn't God did! I prayed and prayed and cried and cried! I have memories of hanging on to the sink and hoisting a baby into it for a bath.....a broken leg.....a wheelchair....many falls.......a food tube pulling out, stomach contents spewing at 4 am...........falls, lots of falls, I wish I could laugh but all I feel is sad that I can`t give her better. I want to give her a life full of different things, the outside different places to see...water....plants....mountains...clouds. I wish I had my family near, my sisters-mom-brothers-nieces-nephews they could pickup where I left off. I don`t see friends very often my ataxia bothers them and maybe I`m boring. I know when I was moving more I hated to be indoors sitting. Where will it end..........if this is the best now what will it be in another 5 years......I guess I`ll pray again, bye blog ;]